Here’s a question for you: why do people always want what they can’t have? Why does the little kid in the candy store long for the king size candy bar even though he knows his parents won’t buy it for him? Why does the hopeless bachelor dream of finding true love even when he knows that even his mother doesn’t like his face? At first glance, most people believe that it is simply stupidity or immaturity. If time is taken it closer inspect the situation, however, it appears to be more of natural reaction or instinct. It’s a pretty tough question so don’t be upset if you can’t nail it right away.
So let’s take a look at the human instinct aspect of this problem. Want is not exactly a human instinct; in fact it is more akin to an emotion. The most similar instinct to want would be the feeling of need. Necessity is one of the most influential instincts in the human mind. It is what drives us to find food and sustenance. However in some cases, the human mind can want something so badly, that it gets its priorities mixed. So instead of simply wanting the object, the mind thinks that it needs the object. This interesting phenomenon is sometimes the root of Kleptomania, along with other things (which by the way is a mental disorder) (Freudenrich, Craig PhD).
But then again, there is the thought that the so called “forbidden fruit syndrome” is simply childlike immaturity instead of an instinct and that it is outgrown with age. Studies show, however, that the behavior that marks the forbidden fruit syndrome is carried on throughout a person’s life, and that these irrational tendencies never really go away (Grohol M, John). Sure, age has something to do with it, as a child is much more likely to act irrationally than an adult, but the fact remains that no matter what the age, people exhibit this behavior.
And it is not just in instances when money or items are involved, this behavior is shown in many other circumstances such as sports, school, and especially relationships. Many studies show that when it came to relationships and interactions with other people, most test subjects showed behavior that supported the “Forbidden Fruit” hypothesis (DeWall, Nathan PhD). In fact, in one particular test, conducted with 100 40 to 50 year old men, 97% of the subjects supported the hypothesis (DeWall, Nathan PhD).
These results pretty much debunk the notion of it being just plain stupidity or immaturity, because let’s face it, how could 97 50 year old men all be too immature to tell right from wrong?
So if all of these things are not the reason…. What is?
Final draft before email really only doing this so i can stay awake
To answer my own question, people always want what they can’t have because they have a physiological disorder. Not a serious disorder like schizophrenia or multiple personalities, but a rather mild one, where your id and your ego are distorted (DeWall, Nathan PhD).
So let’s recap: as opposed to popular belief the forbidden fruit syndrome is not caused by someone’s stupidity or instincts. Instead it is caused by their psyche. The kid in the candy store doesn’t want the candy bar because he is immature, he wants it because his ego and id are mixed. And the hopeless bachelor didn’t wish for his true love because he was stupid, he wished for it because of his id. So instead of just brushing the bachelor or the child off as stupid, next time consider the other possible reasons.
